Life as an Expectant Mother......

During those times when I could not think of being pregnant yet, I used to imagine what a joy it would be to experience the symptoms of carrying a baby, no matter how unpleasant they could be. I thought there would be joy in the "suffering". Alas, I can't say that now because I have been feeling rather awful!

The morning sickness and other symptoms came towards the end of 7 weeks. And I'm one of those special ones who get morning sickness all day long! I need the toilet in the middle of the night, and my fatigue is amazing. All I want to do every day is to fill my stomach and sleep. I say 'fill my stomach' and not 'eat' because I don't crave food at all, like some expectant mothers do. In fact, I have to force myself to eat just so I can ward off nausea that comes with hunger. I've in fact lost about 1 kg from before.

My beanie is 8 weeks along and the size of a grape now. I wish time will pass quickly as I should be ok after the first trimester. And I certainly hope it'll all be worth it when I finally meet baby. : )

My Bit Bit's Birthday - 16 December!

I meant to put this up some time ago but because I have been feeling so lethargic, nothing gets done. I hesitated with this entry because it will expose an almost embarrassing nature of me to the world. But heck, I love her too much to not to recognise her as an important part of me to be mentioned in my blog at all.

We celebrated my Bit Bit's birthday on 16 Dec 2007. I try to celebrate her birthdays by buying a small cake whenever I can. (She loves strawberry or cheese cakes.) Bit Bit is my 23 year-old "daughter". Ok, realistically, she's a stuff toy my mom got me when I was 11-years old. Girls stick to their favorite toys, you see. She's the person I know for the longest time on this planet (besides my family members lah), and I love her to bits. I play with her, talk with her, sleep with her (I still do now). I used to travel with her (we made it to Sydney, Paris, Barcelona, Shanghai etc.) until 911 when security got too tight. Once I brought her to Bintan and my bag, with her in it, was scanned in the machine for a long time because the security officer could not figure out what that object inside was. That was quite funny! I made all the clothes for her. She has quite a character and a life of her own, which I shall not elaborate, because many of you who don't understand girls' relationships with their toys may freak out. Heh heh.....

She may be tad dirty by now, but hey, that great "smell"! After her one and only bath when she was 4-years old, I didn't wash her anymore for fear that she will fall apart at the seams! I wish to preserve her for as long as I can. What's worrying me now is what I'm going to do with her when my baby arrives!

Bit Bit when she was about 15 in her red polka-dot dress.

Bit Bit in her yellow sundress, and chilling out with my iPod.

Miracle of Life

I have been really quiet for the past two weeks because my life is undergoing a major change. I needed time to recover from "shock" and to manage the anxiety somewhat. I found out 2 weeks ago that I'm pregnant! At first when a gestational sac, but not yet the fetus (it was 4 weeks at that time) showed up in my ultrasound scan, my gynae said I could either be pregnant or it could be an empty sac.

You can imagine how terribly anxious I was after that! I have been struggling with thyroid and hormonal imbalance problems for a number of years - such conditions are not pregnancy friendly. I began to imagine that so many things could go wrong and prayed very hard that it would not be an empty sac. As a matter of fact, a few of my friends had the misfortune of being pregnant with empty sacs and so the paranoid me felt the threat was very real.

A week later, I finally saw the tiny yolk sac (which means it is likely to be a viable pregnancy), but because it was so tiny, my gynae could not detect any heart pulsation from the ultrasound. It was only after another few days that we saw the little beanie's heart beating so hard to keep itself going. My gynae dramatically announced: "See this? (pointing to the pulsation on the screen.) This, is the beginning of a new life...." Only then did reality set in for me. It was quite unexpected, really!

I can't thank God enough for this gift of life. I'm praying hard that my health conditions will not affect this pregnancy. So far I'm feeling fine save the normal discomforts of bloatedness, morning sickness and lethargy, and I'm beginning to burst out of my jeans. What's tiring for me is the need to visit the clinic every other day for injections and every 4 days or so for blood tests. (Goodness, I'm drying up! Dracula won't find me delicious anymore.) But I guess this is for the good of my baby, so I'll happily bear with it. I'm also very thankful that I'm on no-pay leave now (what good timing!), so I can hit the bed to rest anytime I wish!

What a Celebration!

Today hubby and I celebrated our 8th Wedding Anniversary. As he had to attend the MCST meeting this evening, we chose to celebrate at lunch instead of dinner. I went to Raffles City (his current workplace) to meet him for lunch at the Italian Cafe, Menotti. Menotti serves wonderful set lunches at a very reasonable price. I brought my camera along in hope to take a picture for remembrance, but alas, the waiters could not even take a decent photograph! After 2 different waiters and 5 takes later, we decided it would be too embarrassing for the Cafe to ask a third waiter to try. Although we selected the flash-off mode, all it takes is for a steady hand to capture a decent photo. Even my 7 year-old nephew can do much better! Anyway I thought it would be funny to just post the (best taken) picture as it is......

Food at Menotti was great but the waiters' photography skills suck!